Life's Seasons

One of the greatest gifts that nature provides in the town I live in, is the incredible and necessary change in seasons about every three months. Each is unique and and offers a beauty the others do not - something you relish in and eagerly wait to come back. And with each season, comes hardships. Things you have to overcome, figure out how to deal with, and are happy to bid farewell as the season draws to a close.

Such is life.

I think back to when we had our babies, three in three years. And if I'm being honest with you, that entire stage of my life feels like a blur. I'm simply amazed when people can recall specific memories of their children because it feels as though I have blacked out many of those early years. My mother-in-law is incredible and can remember the exact time each of her children were born. And I'm over here like, "I think it was the middle of the night?" I truly felt like I was in extreme survival mode for the first few years, just living for that next stretch of sleep to come. Ty and I often avoided going places because we knew it would end in one of the three having a meltdown and honestly, it just did not seem worth it to us. I often had people tell me, "Oh, you got this girl! It's just a season of life you're in right now. It won't always be like this." ...but when you're in the midst of it, it's hard to fathom life beyond your current state, yet the Bible clearly says that there is a time for everything in our lives and seasons come and go.

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:" - Ecclesiastes 3:1

It's no coincidence that after having not even opened my blog for the last two months that I would find myself laying awake, tossing and turning, stewing on the idea of the seasons we face in life. Not too long ago, while doing our Marriage Journal questions, Ty asked me if I had been writing on my blog, to which I kind of frustratedly said, "Oh, heck no. I literally have zero time for that right now." He very calmly, and patiently, reminded me that we are simply in a season. Seasons come, each with their own purpose, each to bring new life, rest, beauty, and challenges. In each season we must recognize where our capacity lies and what needs to be prioritized. I keep having to remind myself, it won't be like this forever and one day, I'll look back and miss these busy, chaotic, crazy moments.

It's easy to sit in our current season, wishing and waiting for reprieve. For it to pass. We think that once we reach that next phase, it's all going to be better - we'll finally be happy and content. But, that is usually not the case. As we enter new seasons, new challenges are presented and suddenly there are new hurdles to overcome. As my oldest sister has always told me, "It's just a different hard."

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. - Galatians 6:9

So then, the real question becomes this: how do we find contentment where we're at? How do we get ourselves to the point where we allow God to use our present circumstances - the good, bad, and hard - to grow us to be able to handle the next season to come? I so desperately wish I could sit here with words of wisdom. That I would be able to present you with the answer that will suddenly shift your perspective. But, I'm still trying to figure this out myself. It's a weird battle I find myself often fighting internally - grasping for the moment we will overcome our current struggles and yet, not wanting to wish away a single second of the stage where our babies currently are. It is through this battle that I believe we need to be willing to give ourselves some grace. If you have children, you know that the early seasons are down right exhausting. If you care at all about the person your child will become as they grow up, you are constantly pouring into each of them. And when you're not trying to shape their character, your making snacks, doing the never-ending laundry, wiping bums, helping to wash hands, picking up Legos and Barbies that have been scattered around the house (because why would we want to keep them in the toy room?????), making sure everyone has a jacket, packing bags, playing games, reading, getting more snacks, doing dishes, putting socks on, finding the missing shoe, kissing owies, breaking up fights, and snacks, snacks, snacks! Whenever my mom comes over for coffee she says to me, "I'm exhausted just watching you." Because I rarely sit down for more than two minutes at a time. It is on these same Friday morning coffee dates, however, that I sit and listen to what my oldest sister is enduring with her older children, that I go back to what she has always told me, "It's just a different hard."

There will come a time when I find myself in a season where I trade one hard for another, but I will also get to trade one joy for another, as well. I will get to experience my marriage and my children in a whole new way. A couple months ago, when there was still snow on the ground, we packed the kids up and took them sledding at a park just down the road from us. A year ago, this would've ended in complete disaster. We would've dealt with severe whining and so. many. tears. But, as we watched our kids fly down the hill independently and march their sleds back up to the top, we made eye contact and did an eye high-five to each other, realizing we've made it to a new season. A season where we can do something such as this and not sit there wondering why we ever thought it was a good idea to leave the house, swearing to never do it again. However, it is also in this season that our kids have legitimate opinions, frustrations, fears, and emotions. Where they say hurtful words when they're mad. New joys, but new hards.

"The life of mortals is like grass, they flourish like a flower of the field; the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more." -Psalm 103: 15-16

All I know is that we cannot constantly be waiting for something better to come. Life just doesn't work that way. And whether you are someone who can relate to the seasons described above, or you're in a completely different spot of life than I am, just remember: the Lord will use wherever we are at to grow us, develop us, draw us closer to Him, and help us realize how desperately we must depend on Him through it all. Wherever we find ourselves in life, we must recognize that we were purposefully placed there in order for God to shape and develop us into the person He intends for us to become. We can either spend the entire season wishing and waiting for it to pass, or we can dig in and find contentment in where God has us. 

One day, my house will be picked up and cleaned for more than an hour. And I know for certain, I will look back and miss the days that were filled with playtime when my kids' imaginations were running wild. I will miss the toys they packed around with them everywhere. I will miss beat up, marker covered walls. (Okay, maybe not that one.) I will long for the days when they fit in my lap and needed me to feel better. But, seasons are necessary. In order to continue to grow and move forward, we must glean whatever we can from each season, learning and growing as we go, in order to be prepared for the next one to come. God gives us what we need for each moment of life we face because if He gave it to us all at once, we would find ourselves overwhelmed and unsure what to do with it all. It would lose its effect on us and wouldn't be engrained as deeply as it is when we are given bits at a time. I think that is one of the best parts of following God - knowing that wherever I find myself in life and whatever I find myself going through, I know He will intentionally and meticulously provide what I need for that exact moment. 

But godliness with contentment is great gain. 7 For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it - 1 Timothy 6:6